Name It. Call it out. Loud and Clear.
When living a personal experience that's unpleasant the biggest mistake we do is to keep quiet and try to deal with those demons silently in our heads.
The first and most crucial step to change or recovery is to label the experience, say what it is. Use a word to describe it.
Problems, personal demons, struggles, whatever we want to call the difficult and disconnected experiences of our lives, they flourish in the dark. In the shadows where we can't see them for all that they are.
Using words out loud is like holding the bull by its horns. It's a way of making the problem known, pulling it out of the shadows and into the light.
In the light where it can't intimidate us, where it can't use our imagination against us.
In the light where we can see all of the mess, the pus, the broken pieces, the extent of the injury.
It's only when we have a clear view of what we are dealing with that we can know the extent of the clean up that's needed.
Each of us struggles with our personal demons longer than we have to because it's comfortable to look away and pretend ignorance.
It's preferred that we show a display of control, to suppress, to forget...
It's preferred we 'wash our dirty laundry' behind closed darkened rooms, in private.
But this modern day approach has failed many, it has failed the domestic violence victim, the person with an eating disorder, the person dealing with depression, the person being bullied, the person suffocating on the inside living a squared role...
Covering it up, looking away or hiding it will not work.
Naming it takes a significant amount of power away from our personal demons. Naming it allows for those deep overwhelming emotions to find an expression. Naming it allows for the true story to be heard. Naming it allows for a healthy response to issues at hand.
Instead of being all over the place, naming it focuses the attention on a particular area. We get a reference of what we are dealing with, we can use the most appropriate tools to help us. We will be better equipped to overcome the negative effects.
Naming it, let's us know what we didn't know thus far.
When we name something that is upsetting, confusing or troublesome, we begin our journey to shift the situation to a more desired place.
We all try too hard. To fit in. To be liked. To play a mold.
And in trying to achieve it we trade a few things like peace of mind, ease, authenticity, success...
There is something to be said about learning new skills, getting better at something, all that, has its place.
But how many of us are playing along with a facade just because others see us a certain way when we do?
And what are we trading for it?
If we play into the perceptions others hold, we move further away from our alignment, and inner guidance. We continue to tangle in a web that will eventually be the death of our spark. And we risk either not living or delay the journey of walking our purpose.
'I am not that person...'
Having the clarity and confidence to use that statement is a potent tool on the path to living a happy life.
We aren't meant for everything, but we are meant to live out a particular piece of the puzzle with our unique abilities, strengthens and aptitude.
Living from a place of inspiration, alignment and purpose requires us to begin to own our strengths and abilities. It requires us to pull back from situations and opportunities that are not in line with who we are. It requires us to know what to ignore and what to explore.
At some point we have to stop trading our authenticity for the sake of perception.
At some point we have to start living from the vantage point of 'I am a person who...'
And so, we start today.