Self Sabotage, The Unnecessary Habit

Over the next few weeks, a series of emails aims at bringing you on a journey with me to level up our skills, confidence, performance and happiness. 

This week is we looking at The unnecessary habit of Self Sabotage.

This one is such a common habit that most people may not even realize that they are stuck in a pattern that won't allow them to be successful or happy!  

Take this short quiz to find out if you fall under the umbrella of a Self Saboteur. 

• Your thoughts are ruled by fear and anxiety of what could go wrong
• You delay actions until the last minute and find yourself chasing deadlines
• You have a crippling experience each time you have to choose between two important decisions
• You constantly make plans and never follow through
• You have insomnia especially when you have to do something very important the next day
• You constantly talk down to yourself, criticize your skills in front of others and wallow in self-pity
• You feel like a fraud like you don't deserve your wins
• You feel inadequate as a person, a parent, a child, a sibling, a partner... (fill in the blank)
• You have exit plans and excuses ready for the possible 'failures' you think are coming

How many of these behaviours (or variations) do you currently do? Answer truthfully, this is an important step. 

Are you a Self-Saboteur? Choose one. 

Yes / No / Room for Improvement 

If it's a No, then woohoo and congratulations on doing a fabulous job at keeping your focus on living life as it comes. At being all that you can be, at showing up and trying each day and allowing yourself the chance to make a difference! You are my hero! (You can stop reading now, until the next email! :) )

For the rest of us who fall under this wide umbrella of self-sabotage, we tend to be quite aware that we are getting in our way. In that moment, we know these actions are going to bring us the same outcome but we do it anyway. 

It's easier to follow the known pattern of failure, blame and self-pity than to travel the world of the unknown route of getting what we want. 

Imagine actually getting that contract, or having a full workshop sign up, or a book deal, or losing that weight, getting a business loan, getting the promotion to run the department... 

It can be a daunting thought, with a lot of potential unknowns, and a lot of people watching if you fail or succeed. Too much work, too much pressure, too much of a limelight...! 

It is this crossroad that sends most of us into the Self Sabotage mode. 

So, you and me, we are going to break this cycle.

Why?

Because, life is short, your talents and skills are unique and someone needs you to show up at your best. 

It's the Time for the Little Wins!

The next step for you would be to identify your top self-sabotage action. The one habit that you know is not serving you, that you do almost on a daily basis and the one that you scold yourself about. 

Got it? Good!

Just For the week: 
It's Monday and we have six days to go. So just for this week, your mission, nay, promise, is to not indulge in the action/habit you have identified. 

Just this week. For six more days. 

During the week, make a note of what happened when you didn't follow through with the Self-Sabotaging action. 

That's it. Write down what you saw unfold when you didn't do what you normally do. 

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I hope you have fun with this assignment this week and you get to experience the little wins! I am going to send you something next week, which will further our levelling up exercise. 

Yes, you can share with me what you have identified, follow up questions and of course your little wins too! Written with Love
Ruby


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